fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Randomize
