jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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