my vag is so smooth its legendary
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
