as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize