just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
