that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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