well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
i just google imaged poop.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
