I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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