i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
