I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
