you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize