So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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