I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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