OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
