I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
why do cheetos always look like penises
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
