I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
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