three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
