Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
