i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
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I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
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I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
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