In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I'm too high and old for this...
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
