they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
third nipple confirmed
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Randomize
