he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize