Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Randomize
