his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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