i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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