THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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