I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
fuck your aforementioned shoe
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize