he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
