We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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