just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize