she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
