Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
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