Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
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