I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
You need Xanax blowdarts
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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