Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize
