Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
