i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
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