If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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