Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
