do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
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