I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I am never drinking with the goths again.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
