she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
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