Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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