can we get nightvision for the apartment?
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
she pinky promised me she was 18
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
