I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
i wish my penis had a tongue
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize
