what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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