5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
