You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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