I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.