just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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