The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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