Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
